From Barn To Barn

By H. P. Devenish

By a curious paradox the South does not offer such hospitality to the thrifty wayfarer as may be found in such generous measure in the Northern Dales. In the South, possibly owing to the steadier winds, haystacks are the order of the day and, even when these are roofed over, the regrettably suspicious nature of these foreigners leads them to place them too near the farm buildings for convenience. The stout stone-built barn situated well apart from other habitations, which has stood four-square to all the storms for many a hundred years amid the hills—typical of the dour yet kindly land which harbours it—and which so thrills the heart on a winter’s night, is there almost unknown.

Yet even in the Yorkshire Dales a certain discrimination is advisable. Here, too, some barns are nearer the home farm than they should be, and indeed are sometimes incorporated with the farm buildings. While these cannot be ignored, their value is restricted, and the experienced barn-walker will only use them in emergency. The average farm-yard dog is apt to misconstrue the midnight wanderer’s approach, and, should the ensuing ululations succeed in conveying to his bucolic master’s mind the idea that something is amiss, the uninvited guest’s rest is apt to be disturbed. A suggestion emanating from the Principality, that an emergency ration of poisoned meat should be carried for such occasions, may be at once discounted as unworthy of the true sportsman.

Field barns may be divided into two classes, those which house cows and those which do not. The former offer the undoubted advantage of an admirable central heating apparatus and for this reason are much favoured by some schools of thought. It cannot, however, be too strongly impressed upon the novice that the countryman has not yet learnt the civilised habit of late rising, and his first waking thoughts always appear to tend cow-wards. At this hour his brain is, if possible, even more bemused than usual, and the effort to understand the explanations arising out of an unpremeditated meeting will only cause him needless pain.

The tactful traveller will therefore arrange his departure at a still earlier hour.

With the barns which harbour no animals so important as the cow, this inconvenience is considerably mitigated, though even here caution is advisable. No hard and fast rules can be laid down, where each case must be judged according to the particular circumstances, but, as a general indication of the accepted modern practice, the following suggestions for the time of departure are offered to the novice :—

1.   Cow-barns.   Half an hour before the arrival of the farmer.

2.   Cowless barns.   Half an hour later than i. Experience is undoubtedly the best teacher, but any

serious infraction of these canons will tend to bring a fine sport into disrepute. Brewers, and others who possess a reputation, will probably require a further half-hour’s handicap, and for this reason it is preferable that all members of the party should be of an approximately similar respectability.

Some exponents of this pastime prefer to practice single-handed, but there is no doubt that double harness offers advantages which cannot be ignored. If, for instance, when the party retires to rest, a back-to-back position is adopted, it will readily be understood that the area of radiation per unit is very considerably reduced, a valuable conservation of heat being thus ensured. The experienced barn-walker will therefore choose his colleague for his bulk rather than his conversational ability, for when the temperature is several degrees below freezing, a man’s more solid qualities will be better appreciated. A tendency to snore should also be deprecated, though this is not of vital importance if the sound practice outlined above be followed.

It has been suggested that local guide-books should be published, giving the accommodation available in each district, with notes on the respective merits of the barns described. Such a course, it is submitted, would not be in the best interests of the pastime, and savours too much of the sybaritic tendencies whose increase has been such a regrettable feature of recent years.